


lights and sounds

by rainbowshoes



Series: you've earned everything you've found [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Abuse of Authority, Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bad BDSM Etiquette, Brainwashing, Break Up, Chronic Pain, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Drug Abuse, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Eye Trauma, Gingerpilot, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Major Character Injury, Make Up, Non-Consensual Filming, Past Brainwashing, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Sexual Abuse, Past Torture, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Torture, Slavery, Stormtrooper Culture, Tenderness, Torture, Trans Armitage Hux, Trans Male Character, Violence, background reylo if you squint, corrective rape, for minor background plot reasons, hux has a cane, poe is a good bean, techie is the one who is a slave in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 07:01:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22709680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowshoes/pseuds/rainbowshoes
Summary: after a training exercise gone horribly wrong, an injured armitage hux left service with the first order and focused on building weapons - bigger and better than anyone else’s - and selling to the highest bidder, establishing himself as a key player in the cold war between the new republic and the first orderresistance pilot poe dameron is forced to question his affection for the unfeeling weapons manufacturer when he realizes hux is the one who sold starkiller base to the order - and has the blood of millions on his hands
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Armitage Hux
Series: you've earned everything you've found [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1767838
Comments: 14
Kudos: 43





	1. Chapter 1

Poe led the way, as he usually did, with Finn and Rey flanking and just a step behind. He felt a little like a flock of Rawwks, but there was nothing to be done for it. He glanced behind himself every now and again, whispering - somewhat harshly, he’d admit - for Rey and Finn to keep up. Their eyes were wide and childlike, taking in all the finery and riches surrounding them. He just wanted to get to Hux’s private rooms _first_ , then he’d let them run off and play around the casino. It would help a lot knowing Techie was keeping an eye on the pair of them, though. Rey had very few manners to speak of, and she was always pissing people off with her sharp tongue. And Finn… Finn was innocent. For all he’d been a stormtrooper, he hadn’t had very many experiences, and to hear him tell it, he’d never even killed anyone because he’d refused to fire his blaster during his first planetside excursion. Not that Poe blamed him. Sometimes, he envied Finn his innocence and _hope_. 

Poe wasn’t so sure he had much of that anymore, no matter what General Organa said.

It took some wrangling, but he eventually guided Rey and Finn up several floors to Hux’s private rooms. The Mandalorian guarding the door had seen Poe enough times now to recognize him. He stopped them anyway. 

“Stop there, Commander,” the Mando said, almost sounding lazy under his helmet. He consulted the commlink strapped to his wrist for a moment. “It was only supposed to be you. Who are these two with you?”

He knew Techie was probably on the other end of that commlink trying to figure out who Finn and Rey were before he even knew their names. “This is Finn and Rey,” Poe said, gesturing to each of them. “The General sent them with me for… backup.” It was a lie. Poe felt like he could see the _whatever you say, buddy_ sort of expression on the Mando’s face on the underside of his helmet. “Look, we don’t have weapons.” 

The door behind the Mando opened and Hux smirked at him even as he leaned heavily on his cane. “The girl can use the Force,” he said, nodding toward Rey. “And that is FN-2187, if I’m not mistaken.” Poe could feel Finn tensing up beside him. 

“He goes by Finn these days,” Poe said cheerfully. It was only a little bit false, the cheery tone. 

Hux focused his attention on Rey. “Before you’re allowed to step into these rooms, you must swear off using the Force.” He said it with more posturing than Poe had seen in a while. He’d met with Hux many times over the last several years, and the posturing and intimidating had faded after about the third time. Then again, Poe had never brought others with him before. 

“And if I don’t?” Rey challenged. Poe sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He really ought to have known better. 

“Then you’ll get nothing,” Hux said with an easy shrug. “No… hmm, what is it your general sent you here for? X-wings, I’m sure. Blasters. Ordinance rockets. As many missiles of varying types as I’ll give you for whatever… meager sum you’ve come to bargain with.” He sneered a bit. Poe knew, by now, that it was mostly all for show. “You get one chance,” he told her, “and I don’t forgive anyone. Ever.”

Poe looked at Rey hard, imploring her to not fuck this up for them. She bit her cheek and nodded, her shoulders slumping as she looked away from them. 

“Very well,” Hux said, his tone pleasant. “Follow me.” He turned, slowly - and Poe wondered if his limp had gotten worse since he’d last been by to see him or if it was just a bad day - and led them into a vast, opulent room with several luxurious couches clustered near the glass wall that looked out over the race track below. The other side of the room had a lengthy bar and a server droid. Hux settled himself in an armchair that made Poe think of a sort of very comfortable throne. He waved his hand - thinner, Poe thought with mild concern, bonier - toward the droid as it approached. “Feel free to order whatever you’d like.” 

“The usual Dorian Quill for me, thanks,” Poe said with a nod to Hux. Hux picked up a glass of what Poe knew to be Chandrilan Blue '439, if only because Hux was always drinking that when Poe came by. He’d tried a glass once, but it wasn’t the sort of thing Poe went in for. Too classy, he supposed. He sat on the long couch across from Hux, settling in for a long chat. Finn and Rey each took a side, perching on the edge of the cushions like the couch might come alive and eat them.

“Uhh,” Finn said under his breath, leaning a little closer to Poe. “I don’t -”

“Finn’ll have an Adumari,” Poe said, picking a beer he figured Finn wouldn’t hate too much, and it also wouldn’t fuck him up after just one glass. He raised an eyebrow at Rey, wondering if she knew what she wanted. 

“Bloodsour,” Rey said confidently. Poe wondered if she’d ever actually had it before, but he wasn’t going to stop her. Hux gave Poe a similar look, but neither of them said anything. “I’ve had it before,” she bit out sourly, clearly picking up on their meaning.

“I didn’t say anything,” Poe said, holding up both hands and grinning. She punched him in the shoulder anyway. He probably deserved it. He usually did. He turned his focus back to Hux. “How’ve you been?” Hux looked… tired. More than he ever had before. There were dark circles under his eyes, and his normally fair complexion was tinged a bit gray. His cheekbones were sharper. He was too thin, Poe thought, and he couldn’t quite tamp down his worry. 

“Well enough,” Hux said, which was more of a non-answer than Poe was expecting. The commlink on the couch beside him beeped twice, and Hux tapped at it quickly. “Techie will join us momentarily.” 

“He’s still hangin’ around, huh?” Poe asked with a slightly forced smile. He genuinely liked Techie. He was a sweet kid. Techie was probably about Rey’s age, he figured, but Poe would always see him as a kid. Probably a mix of how young Techie always looked and how sweet he was. Hux nodded once. It was odd that he didn’t say anything. Poe had expected bragging of some sort. Hux loved to brag about Techie. Maybe it was the inclusion of Rey and Finn to the situation that had Hux biting his tongue. 

It took only a short moment before Techie came through a door from one of the connecting rooms. He had a half-dissected piece of tech in his hands, like always. He smiled brightly when he saw Poe sitting there. “How are you, Poe? It’s been a while.”

“It has,” Poe agreed. “And I’m doing pretty good, all things considered.” Hux narrowed his eyes at that, but Techie didn’t pick up on it. In truth, Poe was still more than a little banged up from his stay on Kylo Ren’s ship and the subsequent crash into the desert on Jakku. “What have you been up to? You look better than you did last time I was here.” He meant that honestly. Hux had replaced Techie’s bionic eyes a few short days before Poe had come to visit last time, and Techie hadn’t been in great shape. 

“This and that,” Techie said with a shrug. He settled on the smaller couch beside Hux, still tinkering with whatever it was he had in his lap. “And yeah, my eyes are great now.” He smiled shyly. 

Rey was staring at whatever was in Techie’s lap curiously. “Is that a -”

“A repulsion coil system, yes,” Techie said with a nod and a smile. “It’s from -”

“A swoop,” Rey said, her entire demeanor shifting to something excited and childlike. Hux was watching her with one eyebrow raised, but she didn’t seem to be paying him any attention. She stood and crossed the floor to sit beside Techie, and Poe was pretty sure Finn also noticed just how tense Hux had suddenly become, his fingers turning white where they were clutching the glass in his hand. “It looks like you got to keep most of it intact. That makes it worlds easier to fix.”

Techie grinned at her. “Oh, yeah, of course. But I’m trying to make it better, not fix it.” He laughed at Rey’s wide-eyed expression. “It’s not that hard.” He put it into her hands, and began to point out bits and pieces and murmur soft explanations, with Rey nodding along every few seconds, her eyes narrowed in concentration.

The droid came over with their drinks, and Rey took hers first, absently sipping at it. Poe took his and Finn’s drinks off the tray and passed Finn’s beer to him before taking a sip of his. It was, as ever, just as he remembered. Hux was relaxing, slowly, in his chair across from them.

“Techie,” he said gently, “perhaps you should take that back to your rooms.”

Techie looked up at Hux and frowned in confusion. “But -”

“Please don’t,” Rey blurted immediately. She glanced at Hux, but her attention was back on Techie a second later. “This is amazing. I’ve only ever been able to break them apart and build them exactly as they were. I had to find _seven_ of them to build a working one. I’d love for you to show me more.” 

“Come on, then,” Techie said, standing and taking her hand. Rey smiled and stood after him, clutching both her drink and the coil in her other arm. Techie paused and looked at Hux. “Don’t worry, there’s nothing important out.” Hux nodded once, sharply, and didn’t take his eyes off them until the door shut between them. 

Finn shifted uncomfortably beside Poe. Poe sighed. “Why don’t you head out to the casino floor? Check out the slot machines for a while or something?” He could tell Finn was extremely uncomfortable being there with Hux. He didn’t blame Finn in the slightest, but he also didn’t think Hux would consent to doing any real business while Finn was there. 

Hux snapped his fingers and the droid that had served their drinks hovered over to them immediately. “Go with… Finn. Give him whatever he might require to enjoy himself.” Poe raised an eyebrow at Hux, but Hux’s face didn’t twitch. 

“But,” Finn spluttered.

“This way, sir,” the droid said politely, pointing the way for Finn. “I can guide you around the casino floor and explain anything you might wish to better understand.”

“Go have fun, buddy,” Poe said cheerfully. “Never know when you might get the chance.” Finn recognized it as the dismissal it was, and though he narrowed his eyes at Poe as if to say _I know what you’re doing and I don’t like it and we will definitely talk about this later_ he followed the droid out to the casino. 

Hux relaxed, a near imperceptible shift in his shoulders and legs. He rested his cane against the arm of the chair at last. “Why the hell were those two sent with you, and why didn’t you leave them out on the casino floor to begin with?” Hux snapped. 

Poe huffed a soft laugh and took another drink. “Because Leia asked me to bring them. She probably wanted them out of her hair for a while, and she also probably wanted them to see a bit more of the universe up close and personal. Rey is from Jakku for pity’s sake.” Hux’s lip curled in distaste. “Exactly.” 

“I’m very glad I found that ysalamir for Techie,” Hux muttered. “She won’t be able to use the Force with it nearby.” 

“I don’t think she’d hurt Techie anyway,” Poe said with an easygoing shrug. “She really isn’t that sort of person.”

“Like us?” Hux asked, one corner of his lip twitching up in a smile. 

Poe smiled, wide and a little cruel. “Yeah, like us.” He took another sip of his drink, realized it was nearly empty, and almost wished - for a lot of things he shouldn’t wish for. “You look… tired.”

“I am,” Hux said honestly. “I’ve… a new weapon. If you’re interested. No one else knows about it yet. Consider my telling you first a weakness born of sentiment.” Hux said it with such derision that Poe almost winced. 

“What is it?” He was curious, naturally. What sort of weapon design had wiped Hux out so badly? Surely it couldn’t be anything too different. 

Hux tapped at his commlink for a few seconds, then a projection appeared in the air, glowing faintly blue. “It’s called Starkiller,” Hux said quietly, pride evident over every inch of his face. Poe swallowed hard. “It harnesses the power of a star, drains it completely, and uses the stored energy to fire a photon cannon capable of hitting multiple targets at once.” 

“Mother of moons,” Poe whispered. “How - how big is that thing?” Had to be huge, he figured, to do that sort of damage. 

“The size of a small planet,” Hux answered. He tapped again at his commlink, a much smaller circle appearing beside the first. “For reference of scale, that,” he pointed to the small circle, “is the Death Star.” 

Poe felt like his lungs had been crushed inside his chest. He drained the last of his drink. “I really don’t want to know how much you’re asking for something like that.” He knew why Hux had built it. Because he could. That was why Hux did everything he did. Simply because he wanted to or because it was possible. Poe had to admit that, with a weapon like that, the Resistance would absolutely demolish the First Order. He wanted it so bad he could taste it. But he also knew Leia would never, not in a million lifetimes, ever go for something like that. 

“Rather more than your pathetic Resistance can afford, I assure you,” Hux said with a laugh. 

“I can’t -” Poe began, shaking his head.

“Oh, I know,” Hux said. He tapped at his commlink again and the projections disappeared. “I thought I might warn you, though. I’m certain the First Order can afford it.” He looked haughty and regal, just then, and Poe ached with a quiet sort of desperation. For what, he couldn’t quite say. Or, at least, he didn’t want to admit. 

“Well, thanks, I guess,” Poe said quietly. He didn’t dare suggest anything like Hux _not_ selling it. He knew better. He also knew that Hux could have taken over the entire _universe_ a decade ago without breaking a sweat. He had enough weapons and droids and sheer, raw power to have done it. But Hux wasn’t the type, not really. He controlled his unknown portion of the galaxy with an iron fist, and that was enough for him. He had no desire to attempt to rule everything. Hux had once said he didn’t care enough about the wellbeing of the galaxy, so why should he bother?

“I don’t suppose you’ll sell me a way to shut it down, will you?” Poe asked with a weak grin.

“Not a chance,” Hux said with a nasty smirk. It spoke of power. Of confidence. Of pride. Poe wanted to wipe it off his face - it was _how_ he wanted to get rid of it that was the problem. “I might consider selling the schematics later, though. We’ll see, hm?” He tapped the handle of his cane against his knee. “How much money are you willing to give me for what you want?”

“I’ve got half a million credits,” Poe admitted. “I might be able to negotiate for more, if you’re willing to deal.”

Hux smiled, a slow, creeping thing that transformed his entire face. “Well, now, Commander, that rather depends on you, doesn’t it?”

Poe felt a hot flare bolt through his body. “Really?” He laughed softly. He leaned back on the couch and swirled his empty glass in the air, wishing there was still liquid inside. “We _are_ talking about the same thing, here, right?”

“Oh, you mean the part where, in exchange for a night of sexual favors, I give you an absolutely ridiculous discount on my highly prized weapons and ships? If so, then yes, I do believe we are.” Hux was still smirking, and Poe felt heat coil low in his belly. “Although, I don’t believe we’ll have as much time as I should like. Because you had to bring… _friends_.”

Not for the first time, Poe regretted caving to Leia’s request that he bring Rey and Finn along with him. “Mm, well, we can make the most of the next few hours, right? I’m sure Techie will keep Rey entertained, and Finn can have fun on the casino floor.”

“Underestimating me again,” Hux chided.

Poe laughed. “No, not underestimating you. Thinking realistically. We have a few hours before Rey and Finn begin to wonder where the hell I am, and you look like you’re ready to fall over. When was the last time you ate anything?” He couldn’t quite hold back the worried tone and Hux sneered at him. 

“That’s none of your concern, really,” he said bitingly. “I’ve asked if you want to fuck. I haven’t gotten an answer.”

“Yeah,” Poe said immediately. He hadn’t had the time for sex since the last time he and Hux had gone at it like rabbits for an entire night, stimms keeping them both going because Poe always had a limited amount of time, and Hux was always determined to get everything wanted out of Poe before he left. Poe carefully didn’t think about why he hadn’t found the time, about why no one really appealed to him lately. 

He stood, and Hux used his cane to help himself stand. He led the way to the door on the opposite side of the room from where Techie had taken Rey. It was Hux’s bedroom. Or at least the bedroom he used while he was in Canto Bight. It had too much of a sterile, hotel-room feel for it to be Hux’s actual bedroom. 

The moment the door shut behind Poe, Hux pressed him against the wall and covered his mouth with his own. Poe’s hands went straight to Hux’s hips, pulling him closer while simultaneously helping Hux stay upright. Hux had never been self-conscious about his bad leg, and while Poe was grateful for that, it still meant they had to work around it. Usually, that meant he was supporting Hux. Not that he minded. 

Hux peeled Poe’s shirt over his head and tossed it on the floor before working at the fastening to his trousers. Poe tugged at Hux’s shirt in exchange. Their kisses were messy, mostly uncoordinated things as they undressed each other as quickly as they could. Poe didn’t mind. He traced the outline of Hux’s ribs with his fingertips, but he didn’t say a word about how thin he’d become. It wasn’t his place. Hux, in turn, carefully avoided the worst of the lingering bruises around Poe’s ribs and the abrasions that had scarred even with the bacta patches he’d applied. His skin was a motley of color these days, and he found himself wondering distantly if he and Hux might ever be able to be together without so much damage between them.

Probably not. 

Once Poe’s trousers hit the floor, he toed off his boots and walked Hux backward to the large bed, making sure Hux didn’t miss a step and stumble. The moment he had Hux on the bed, he pushed him down to lie on his back and yanked off his shoes, socks, and trousers. Poe didn’t waste a moment. The very instant Hux was naked before him, he pressed his face between Hux’s legs, his tongue unerringly finding Hux’s clit to flick and suck at it. He reveled in the sounds that came from Hux’s throat and the way Hux fisted Poe’s hair and began to direct him. It was perhaps five minutes of Hux attempting to fuck Poe’s face before he yanked Poe back by the hair. 

“Get on with it. We haven’t got the time for more than one round, no matter how much I’d like to keep you on your knees.” 

Poe laughed, bright and cheerful. Hux even smiled at him in return. He helped Hux shift onto the bed properly, one pillow shoved under his hips and another under his bad leg to help support his badly-damaged thigh. Hux pressed the bottle of lubricant into his hand, and Poe slicked himself up quickly before sliding inside Hux, reveling in the tight, wet heat of him. He kissed and licked and bit along Huxes shoulders and chest as he thrust slowly, one hand pressed between Hux’s hips with his thumb rubbing constantly at his clit while the other gripped the undamaged thigh. 

He’d been badly injured at some point, though Poe didn’t know how and hadn’t asked. Whatever had happened, the blaster shot in Hux’s thigh hadn’t been treated quickly enough to prevent any damage. Even a bacta tank hadn’t been able to reverse the muscle death Hux had experienced. Now his thigh was permanently disfigured and caused him quite a lot of pain. Poe was careful to avoid it as much as he could unless Hux told him to help him move his leg. 

Hux’s fingers dug into Poe’s curls and dragged his face over to one of his nipples. Poe licked at it, delighted, and fucked him deep and slow as Hux’s back arched into a perfect bow. He was a little afraid he’d snap Hux in half with how skinny he’d become, but he didn’t stop. He bit gently at Hux’s nipples, and Hux groaned long and loud. Poe picked up his pace, moving his face back to Hux’s to kiss him. Hux was none too gentle, yanking on Poe’s hair and biting his lip and bucking his hips as much as he was able to meet Poe’s every thrust. 

Hux’s nails scored Poe’s back, and he groaned, dropping his forehead to Hux’s shoulder and hitching his thigh higher over his hip. Hux’s heel dug into his ass, urging him closer. “I’m definitely not gonna last,” Poe admitted in a huff of air. He could feel his orgasm building already, coiling tight in his balls. 

“Useless,” Hux murmured into Poe’s ear, and Poe laughed. 

“I’ll eat you out until you’re shaking,” Poe swore, and he slammed into Hux a few more times as his orgasm crashed over him. He kissed Hux again with bruising intensity, then rolled to the side just before his shaking muscles threatened to collapse. He grinned up at the ceiling, feeling sated and tired and lazy. 

“You’re about as useful as a porg,” Hux muttered, shoving Poe’s shoulder with his own. 

“Cute as one, too,” Poe said with a laugh. “Gimme a minute, will you?”

“Exactly one minute,” Hux said imperiously.

“Yes, your highness,” Poe said as he rolled his eyes. Hux shoved him again, and they both huffed quiet laughs.

In exactly one minute, Poe rolled over and slid down Hux’s body, kissing and licking and nibbling at all the small, sensitive places he’d found. He curled one arm around the underside of Hux’s uninjured thigh to hold him in place, then used his other hand to finger him, finding his g-spot with almost no effort as he sucked and licked at his clit. It seemed to take forever for Hux to tense and curl in on himself. His soft moan got a little louder and increased in pitch as he began to twitch and shake. Poe eased off and out of him in slow increments until Hux shoved his head away with a rough push. He wiped off his mouth using the back of one arm and shimmied his way back up the bed to lie beside Hux again. 

Hux almost immediately pushed himself upright to rest against the headboard and he found the skinny vaporizer he liked to keep by his bed for exactly moments like this. The smell was sort of sweet, a little citrusy. Poe figured Hux had probably added stimms to the oil he smoked, but he knew better than to say anything about it. Sure enough, Hux was jittery beside him a moment later. 

“I need a nap,” Poe sighed. He draped one arm over his eyes to block out the faint light that shone in from the track on the other side of the glass wall. 

“Too bad,” Hux said quietly. “You brought _friends_ , remember?” He exhaled again, and Poe imagined the puff of smoke that would linger for a few seconds before dissipating. “Such a nuisance.”

“They’re fine,” Poe said, and he truly believed that. Techie and Rey would be geeking it out over junk parts and Finn was probably gambling away every penny Hux had at the slots or tables. “We deserve sleep. We just struck a ridiculously good deal.”

Hux snorted. “We haven’t agreed to anything yet. Half a million credits.” He snorted again, his derision plain. “I can give you -”

Poe rolled over and pressed his face to Hux’s bony hip. “Nope, not yet. Don’t ruin my afterglow.” 

Hux was quiet, but then Poe felt his hand combing delicately through Poe’s curls, and he smiled. Hux could be persuaded to sit there quietly for a few minutes, sometimes, but usually Poe had to work a fair bit harder at it. He figured it was more of an indication of how tired Hux really was versus anything he’d done. Or, gods forgive, how Hux felt about him. He didn’t quite believe Hux didn’t have feelings, not like some, but he knew it was a lot harder for Hux to feel things, and he didn’t fault him for that. Whatever had happened to Hux had been bad, he knew that from the few times he’d actually slept in the bed with Hux and Hux had woken him with night terrors. He never asked, though, too afraid Hux would shut him out and refuse to let him return. 

As he drifted off into a light doze, he wondered how different things might have been if Hux hadn’t been injured so badly so early in life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bad things happen bingo square N3: recorded/broadcast torture

Rey sat with Techie on a low, worn couch that was more comfortable than anything she'd ever been on before. She liked Techie's room. There was a bed shoved off to one side in a dark corner, but the rest… oh, the rest. There was a desk with a bank of monitors on it - all dark - that they didn't approach and she didn't ask about. But nearly every other inch of the room had shelves with baskets full of parts, tables with half-assembled bits and pieces scattered on them, and tiny little copper animal sculptures. Techie had almost immediately given her a bracelet with a delicate looking flower and vine pattern. She'd tucked it carefully under the arm guard she wore, keeping it secret and precious. 

Techie sat beside her, parts scattered between them as he showed her the modifications he was making to the repulsor coil. 

He was slight and pale, sort of like Hux, she supposed, though Hux's hair was a darker shade than the bright orange of Techie's hair. His eyes were big and blue - and it had taken her an embarrassingly long moment to realize they were bionic, mechanized. The pupils dilated rapidly, and she could almost hear the faint whir of them as Techie focused and refocused. His tunic was very plain, light gray with a brilliant yellow sash at his waist. He didn't wear shoes. But the part she was the most curious about, and that made her stomach twist, was the thick collar at his throat.

It was made of black metal, matte and unshining. Solid. But unblemished. There were no scratches or scuffs, and it was clearly well cared-for. 

"Why…" she hesitated, then sucked in a breath and bulled her way through what she wanted to ask. "Does Hux own you as his slave? Aren't you his brother?" She was guessing, but the resemblance between them was too much to be a coincidence. She couldn't really check with the Force. She wasn't really skilled enough at it, and besides, the leathery, orange lizard perched on the back of the couch had some sort of Force-dampening ability. Getting near it had felt like being dunked in cold water, but she'd adjusted. 

Techie's fingers stilled for a moment. He looked up at Rey, and she felt her heart breaking at the sad expression he wore. She would _kill_ Hux for doing this to Techie. Fuck them needing him for his weapons. She would -

"When I was a baby, my home planet was bombed, raided," he said, his voice pitched low and soft. "I was… maybe a year old. Armi is older than me by five years. He is our father's bastard. I'm the trueborn son." He shrugged. "Not that it mattered much when the planet was burning. He and Armi thought I was dead, and they fled. The raiders found me. Took me. And I became a slave. When I was thirteen, they sold me to a pleasure house." 

Rey's stomach twisted further. "And Hux hasn't - hasn't freed you?" She was horrified. How could he treat his _own brother_ in such a way?

Techie smiled, a little. "Hux found me and bought me from my last master. He'd been kind, mostly. Others hadn't. But Hux…." Techie sighed, and it sounded a little wistful. "He bought me and he offered to free me and I said no. Because -" He curled in on himself, at that, and Rey wanted so badly to reach out and touch him. She didn't. "It's safer this way. As long as I wear this," he smoothed his fingers over the collar at his throat, "no one can touch me. No one would _dare_. I'm worth more as a slave than a person. And I like it here on Canto Bight. The droids come to me when they need to be fixed, and I can have anything I want. I like watching people, too. They're all so fascinating. But without the collar, I'm nothing. I'm just a technician. This way, Armi keeps me safe." 

"But…" Rey argued, unsure of why. She had no words. There was just a sense of… wrongness to it. "He _owns_ you," she said, low and distressed and uncomprehending. 

Techie smiled. "Yes, he does. And because of that, if anyone tries to do anything I don't like, Armi gets to kill them for it." He laughed, a bright bubbly sound, and began fiddling with the coil again. "There was a slaver here, once. He tried to take me. The droids told Armi, and he sent one of the Mandalorians to stop him from getting me onto his ship. That Mando kept the slaver locked in a cell until Armi arrived, and he made an example of him. The other time it was a senator. He had some backwater little planet in the mid-rim, and Armi cut off his hand for daring to touch me." 

Horror twisted Rey's stomach so tight she thought she might gag. "What…"

"I was a pleasure slave," Techie said, looking at her with his big, sad eyes again. "Most of them can look at me and tell. Or they knew of me because of one of my other masters. There are holovids that still circulate, that show what my old masters have done to me." He lifted one hand to touch his cheek just under his eye. "Armi watched the one where they took my eyes, but he won't watch the others." 

Rey covered her mouth with her hand. "Your master did that to you?" Techie nodded. "Unkar Plutt always threatened to sell me as a slave, but he never followed through. I - sometimes, I thought it would have been easier." She wrapped her arms around herself and squeezed.

"Not everyone ends up like me," Techie said brightly, almost… _encouraging_. "Pleasure slaves are usually well-respected and prized. But I - I was too damaged. So they just hurt me more." He stood, then, setting the coil on the cushion. Rey followed him over to the bank of monitors, curious. He poked at one of them, then a keyboard, then inserted a drive. She watched the progress bar curiously. 

"What is this?" She asked once Techie pressed the drive into her hand. 

"It's me," he said. "I want you to see it. And I want you to know that Armi saved me from all of it, and that it will never happen again as long as he's alive. So he keeps me safe, and I keep him safe, too." His expression hardened into something wholly unlike him for a moment. "I will do _anything_ to keep him safe. Anything at all." Then his features changed back to the soft, shy boy he had been before and he led them to the couch again. Rey sat, feeling a bit numb, her thumb tracing over the design on the drive's casing. He held out the coil for her, and she tucked the drive into her belt. "You'd have made a good pleasure slave. You're pretty and strong." 

She laughed. "No, I wouldn't have. Nearly everyone who meets me thinks I'm loud and too stubborn for my own good." She thought, fondly, of the first screaming match she'd had with Poe. She'd enjoyed herself far too much, probably. 

"My old master would have had fun breaking you," Techie remarked thoughtfully. Rey grimaced at that. "He's dead now, don't worry. Armi let me kill him." 

The conversation shifted back to the coil and the improvements and what Techie was planning to do with it - some sort of demonstration at a technical conference he was attending on Hosnian Prime later in the year - and just how fast the speeder would be once he was finished with it. Rey followed along easily enough, but she was only half paying attention.

Techie was strange. Stranger than she'd first thought. He seemed so sweet, but apparently he could be just as ruthless as Hux in the other room. Finn had whispered some rumors to her, here and there, about what he'd heard about Hux while he was in the Academy, but it had all seemed so far-fetched until she'd met the man. Now, she could absolutely believe that cold, unfeeling creature out there could murder seven of his classmates just to prove a point. Or that he had killed an entire squadron of stormtroopers when they failed to adapt to the conditioning he'd supposedly designed. 

She'd asked Finn what had happened with him, then, meaning it as a tease - _how were you able to slip through all that conditioning, then_? 

Finn had given her a solemn, serious look. "His regiment was discontinued because the survival rate was too low. One in four of those in his program died - either as a result of the conditioning, because another person killed them for their spot, or because they killed themselves." 

She thought about the drive in her belt. She thought about how Hux, a man who built weapons and sold to anyone and seemed to have no morals to speak of, was still a better option than Techie's other masters. How bad must it have been, that Techie _chose_ to stay enslaved to Hux for the protection it offered him? 

It was hours later when Poe came to get her and they went out on the casino floor to find Finn. Finn was sleeping the sleep of the drunk, and she had to mostly carry him back to the Falcon. Once he was installed in a bunk and Poe got them into space, she sat at a monitor and inserted the drive. 

There were _thousands_ of holovids. Her stomach turned. She clicked one of them.

Techie's screams filled the air immediately. He was stripped naked, only his back visible as someone out of the shot struck him again and again with a whip. She saw the first spurt of blood and closed the video. 

Something in her drove her to open another vid. Curiosity, maybe. A need to understand. Or maybe she was looking for proof of just how _bad_ Techie had had things before Hux so she could justify not killing him for keeping Techie enslaved.

She had never realized the horror of the bacta tanks before now. She’d never had access to one herself, only had the patches - and precious few of those. But as she watched the videos, watched people stab Techie again and again, watched them peel the skin from his body, watched them rip off fingernails and pull out teeth, watched them rape him again and again, she realized with rising nausea just how terrible bacta tanks could be. Those people could hurt Techie again and again, and as long as they didn’t cut off a limb or leave the damage too long, they could just toss him into a bacta tank, and he would heal. 

She watched them gouge out Techies eyes. Poe reached around in front of her and cut off the video. He squeezed her shoulder, and she closed her eyes. She could still see the image of Techie stretched over a table, hands pinning down his wrists and ankles as a woman with short, choppy hair and a nasty facial scar dug her thumbs into Techie’s eye sockets.

“I take it Techie gave you those?” Poe asked, his voice low and serious. Rey nodded and opened her eyes. She used the sides of her hands to quickly wipe at her tears. “He probably shouldn’t have.”

“He wanted me to understand,” she whispered. “He - he said Hux was protecting him, but he knew I was struggling with that.”

Poe nodded and crossed his arms over his chest. “Hux isn’t a bad person. He’s completely neutral. He makes weapons because he’s good at it and he enjoys doing it. I don’t know the rest of his history, but…” Poe pressed his lips together, and Rey reached out with the Force, tentative and delicate. 

She could see… flashes. Hux, naked in bed. Somehow, she wasn’t surprised by that part. But the scars… Hux’s thigh, twisted and deformed. The dark-colored striations across Hux’s back. Smooth, no raised mark, only the colors. The sight of his ribs poking through his too-thin chest. 

“Someone hurt Hux, too,” she whispered. “Gods, why?”

“I don’t know,” Poe said with a shrug, “and I’m not going to ask. But just know… Hux might not be a _good_ person, but he isn’t a bad one, either, not really. He loves Techie far too much to let any harm come to him. Techie might be the only thing in the galaxy Hux cares for, but… He would sacrifice anything to keep him safe.”

Rey hummed softly and didn’t respond. She had liked Techie. He was sweet and he hadn’t deserved what had happened to him. She thought… perhaps she could understand at least that about Hux. She wouldn’t want anything to happen to Techie, either, and if that meant leaving Hux well enough alone… Well. She’d made greater sacrifices, hadn’t she?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the destruction of starkiller and how it comes to be

The battle hadn’t really begun when Poe got the transmission request. He denied it, at first, focusing instead on the check-in process from his flight crew. They had all just dropped out of hyper-speed, and he was preparing the strafing run against the base, waiting only for the signal from Finn that they’d found Rey and that the sheilds were down. 

The connection broke through anyway, without Poe accepting it. 

“Poe!” It was  _ Hux _ . “I’m sending you a data file,” he said, sounding as if he was out of breath. “It’s the schematics for Starkiller base. You  _ must _ take it down. There isn’t much time. They’re targeting the Hosnian system.”

“Whoa,” Poe murmured, eyes darting over the schematics that had appeared in front of him. Hux had highlighted the weaknesses and Poe immediately understood what needed to happen. He could hear one of his leaders attempting to hail him, but he ignored it, focusing on the schematics. “Why are you helping us?” He was suspicious, naturally. He doubted this was some sort of trap, but Hux didn’t favor one side or the other, and it wasn’t like him to help.

“Techie is on Hosnian Prime,” Hux said, hushed and fearful. Poe felt his stomach drop to his feet. 

“Oh, gods,” he whispered. 

“I’ve already told him to get off planet immediately, but there won’t be enough time for him to escape, not when the system goes binary from the explosion.” 

Poe gaped, shocked and horrified. He’d understood, on a very basic level, what Starkiller base was capable of. Facing it now - the destruction of an entire system - was unconscionable. He didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to react. It was too much, too quick.

“If you don’t stop them from firing, I swear to every god in existence, I will never fuck you again.” Poe choked a laugh at Hux’s half-desperate plea. 

And then the adrenaline kicked in. 

He flicked a switch on his comms, not caring that Hux was probably still listening in. “Alright, teams. Listen up. I’ve gotten some new information.” He sent the schematics to them and the base where General Organa was operating. “Finn, Han, Chewie? You guys are going to have to do a little more work than just getting the sheilds down. Sorry. We have to blow it up from the inside, and once that’s started, our strafing runs will assist with the total destruction. We need to hit  _ three _ points simultaneously. Any questions?”

“Copy, Black Leader,” most of the other pilots responded, voices hushed and awed and - Poe had to admit - frightened. He didn’t blame them.

“We’re the distraction,” Poe said, his face settling into a grim smile. “Well, let’s get to it. We have to make sure the First Order and General Pryde are focused on us, not on the guys on the ground. We can do this.” He got confirmations from his leaders, then flicked the comms back to the channel still reading as active with Hux on the other end. 

“I’m doing all I can,” Hux said, voice strained. “But all I can do from here is slow them down a bit. They’ve already caught on, and they’re fighting me at every turn.” He made a frustrated noise. “I don’t have Techie to help. Tell your people on the base to make it quick.”

“They’ll move as fast as they can,” Poe swore, because he knew it was true. “Hux…”

“Don’t,” Hux snapped, so much  _ anger _ in his voice. “Just - do me a favor and kill Pryde. Do that, and I’ll build you a brand new X-wing.” Poe had never heard so much longing in Hux’s voice, and a cold stone of worry settled low in his gut. 

“I’ll do my best,” Poe said quietly. “I’ve got to go. We’ll - we’ll discuss this later.”

Hux didn’t say a word, but Poe watched the light signaling the connection go out. He turned his attention to his radar, giving into a very brief second of worry for his pilots, and then he signaled the attack.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bad things happen bingo square G4 - whipping

“Commander Dameron,” General Organa’s voice called, sharp and just a little bit angry. “My office, if you please.” He groaned to himself and gently climbed out of the cockpit. He’d been slung around more than a little bit while in Starkiller base’s gravitational field, and he was certain he was bruised on all sides. BB-8 chirped at him, still waiting to be let down from his spot on the x-wing. 

“Come to the General’s office after you get checked out, buddy,” Poe told him. BB-8 chimed that he would and whistled a soft, melancholy tune as Poe walked away. 

He was exhausted. The adrenaline had worn off about five minutes before landing, and he wanted nothing more than to crawl into the nearest bunk and sleep for two days. They’d lost all but about six of their pilots, Finn had been hurt something awful, and Rey had almost immediately run off with Chewie to go find Luke once they’d dropped Poe at the base. 

Han Solo was dead. 

He dragged himself to Leia’s office, helmet still tucked under his arm. She was standing on the other side of her desk, her arms crossed over her chest. He set his helmet between them and began unzipping his flight suit, desperate to cool down a bit. He knew he stank of sweat, but it was too hot to keep the suit on entirely. He tied the arms around his waist, tugging at the thin shirt sticking to his chest. 

“Tell me how you got those schematics,” Leia said, her voice just a bit cold, just a bit suspicious. 

Poe sighed and scraped a hand through his hair. “Hux contacted me just after we arrived at the base. He sent them directly to my ship, and I sent them to everyone else.”

“Why?” Leia demanded. 

And Poe, for a moment, really didn’t want to answer her. He was exhausted. All he wanted to do was go sleep for a while. Give himself a nap, and then he’d be able to handle this. But he couldn’t deal with it right now, and he wanted to snap at her for questioning him like this. 

“Because Techie, Hux’s little brother, was on Hosnian Prime, and Hux would destroy the galaxy for Techie,” Poe answered, bitter. “And, you know, he said he’d never fuck me again if we didn’t stop it, so.”

Poe froze when he realized he’d said that last bit aloud. To her credit, Leia only blinked at him a few times. 

“You what?” Leia asked. He knew she’d heard him. She wanted to make him say it again. He didn’t want to. 

He huffed a frustrated sigh and yanked his hand through his hair again, annoyed when it hurt because his fingers snagged against tangles. “How the hell do you think I get such good deals on everything, huh? We fuck when I see him. He offered, that first time, and I agreed. I wanted him, and if I could get a bonus out of him, I figured why the hell not. It was helping the Resistance, anyway. It’s not -” He bit his lip. It _was_ a big deal, and he couldn’t really say it wasn’t. “I’m not betraying the Resistance.” There, that was true. 

Leia stared at him impassively for a while. “That’s how you knew about the weapon in the first place,” she said. “Hux offered it to you first, didn’t he?” Poe nodded once. She pressed her hand to her forehead. “I can’t deal with this right now. Go. Shower, rest. We’ll talk about it later.”

Poe nodded and left the office, barely remembering to grab his helmet. He passed Lieutenant Connix and Admiral Staturna with their heads pressed together over a pile of drives. When Kaydel saw him walking by, she waved him over. 

“What’s up?” Poe asked, knowing he sounded as tired as he looked.

“Rey brought these to us. Apparently Finn and Han stole them from Starkiller base. We’ll need some help going through all the data.” She frowned at him for a moment. “Go shower and take a nap and then come find us. We’ve got a lot to get through.”

“Yeah, sure thing,” Poe said, already feeling even more tired. 

When he reached his small room, BB-8 was waiting for him. He crashed into his cot without so much as stripping out of his flight suit. He woke up six hours later sweating and shaking from low blood sugar. He found some sort of protein bar that was probably more than a year old, ate it anyway, and hauled himself into the sonic shower. He wanted to go back and see Hux on Canto Bight if only for his shower with endless hot water. Real water. He wanted to take BB-8, too, let Techie play with him a bit. Poe might not have been a tech genius like Techie and Hux, but he'd modded BB-8 himself, and he was proud. 

He was sore and felt tender all over as he dressed. There were a few bruises here and there, but it wasn’t anything he would worry over. BB-8 beeped at him, wondering if he needed bacta patches, but Poe shook his head. They would heal. It wasn’t worth wasting the precious few patches they had to make them go away faster. 

He headed out of his room, BB-8 trailing along, and asked around until he found where Kaydel had taken all those drives to look over them. He wasn’t looking forward to going through an endless data dump, but he could recognize the importance of it and why he, specifically, was being asked to assist. They were all hoping for more information on the weapons and ships they had.

He took up a chair on the far side of the room, picked a data drive at random, and began sifting through files. He frowned a bit when he realized he wasn't looking at anything related to the base, but rather, he had before him information on the Stormtrooper program. The first drive contained personnel files from several years ago to the present day. He set it aside after marking it clearly, then grabbed another drive. 

_academyprogram_test238.796.5.1

He clicked the file. 

He regretted it. 

It took several long seconds for him to process precisely what - and who - he was looking at. There was a chair in the middle of an empty room, and the holovid showed a night vision aspect. The room was dark and bare, freezing cold judging from the occasional puffs of hot breath, and the person in the chair had been cuffed to it by the wrists and ankles. 

" _cherished beliefs will be safeguarded. We will defend our ideals by force of arms. We will give no ground to our enemies and we will stand together against attacks from within or without. Let the enemies of the Empire take heed: Those who challenge Imperial resolve will be crushed. We have taken on a task that will be difficult, but the people of the Empire are ready for the challenge. Because of our efforts, the galaxy has traded war_ ," the person was whispering to themselves. He recognized it as an old speech of Palpatine's, from the moment he'd officially disrupted the Republic and had taken control. He'd learned it from his parents - it had been an important speech, at the time, and they had wanted him to know what it was like to see a Republic crumble, how those who toppled it tried to justify it. He'd listened to the speeches enough times to memorize most of them. 

It lasted for hours. Poe skipped in small increments to the end of the vid, astonished that it lasted for over fourteen hours, endlessly relentless. Sensory deprivation torture. This was considered training for Stormtroopers? He felt sick, and he _really_ needed to ask Finn about this.

The next video featured the same person. They were again seated in a chair and cuffed in place. This time, there were electrodes stuck to their skin in various places. They were in shorts and some sort of tight, cropped shirt that bared miles of pale skin. They looked familiar in a way that was unsettling. Poe _knew_ he had seen them before. But he couldn't immediately place them.

In the vid, a projection was visible. "Who is this?" asked a faceless voice. 

"That _was_ Private Kyllian," the one on screen answered arrogantly. 

"How did they die?" 

"I shot him."

"Why?"

"Because he was a failure. He was unable to reach his projected goals for the quarter. I wanted his position. I was stronger, smarter, and faster, and I proved it." Pride. Triumph. Poe chewed at his bottom lip. He _knew_ those expressions. But where?

"How would you describe his corpse?"

"Garbage." A sneer. "Not worth the effort of incineration."

"How do you feel about his death? About knowing you caused it?" 

A pause. Caution flickered across their face. "Proud," came the answer at last. They seized instantly, jerking hard against the restraints. Poe felt the protein bar he'd eaten churn in his stomach. This was electroshock conditioning. BB-8 beeped mournfully at him, but he ignored it. When the shocks ended - it had only lasted a few seconds, but it felt like longer - the person sagged briefly, gasping for air and blinking away tears. "Nothing. I don't feel anything." 

"Better." Even the praise was toneless. 

The video jerked and shifted. Another corpse had been presented in front of the person in the chair. They visibly recoiled from the sight, and the electric was instantaneous. Poe clenched his hands together and pressed the sides of his fingers to his mouth. He couldn't look away, even if he didn't want to see any of this. 

"Who is this, corporal?" 

A ragged breath. "It's - it's Sergeant Yinten, sir." 

"Did you kill him?" 

A quick shake of the head. They were shocked again, barely a second this time, but the pained gasp after made Poe shift uncomfortably. "I swear I didn't -" Another shock, longer this time. 

When it ended, the person in the chair had their eyes squeezed shut. They were trembling. Poe watched their mouth move again and again. He eventually worked out that they were whispering "order through obedience" repetitively. He felt chills steal down his spine. 

"What caused his death?" the voice asked, hard and unrelenting. 

"I did," came the soft answer. They were staring at the floor. Their eyes were the clearest blue Poe had ever seen, and tinged in red from the tears brought on by the shocks, it made them look sickly. "I - I assisted him on a project." 

Another shock, and when it ended, they cried out softly. It was bitten down so viciously, Poe ached himself. 

The video changed again. Same person, same chair. Same disembodied voice asking questions. 

"Why did you defend Corporal Win'ja?"

"Because she hadn't done anything wrong." 

A shock. 

"Why did you defend Corporal Win'ja?"

"Because she was innocent."

Another shock, longer this time. They were panting and gasping at the end, struggling to remain upright. 

"Why did you defend Corporal Win'ja?"

"She didn't deserve to die," came the whispered answer, and another shock, worse than the others. The one in the chair tensed all over, and Poe could see the moment when one of their teeth cracked from the pressure. It made his mouth ache in sympathy. When, at last, the shock ended, they sagged over their own lap, head lolling. 

"Why did you defend Corporal Win'ja?"

"Because I wanted her to live." Another whisper. 

"Why?"

"She was valuable."

"What did she do wrong?"

"She disobeyed orders." Poe watched the fist clench and unclench rapidly. 

"What was the correct action in the scenario?" 

"Report her to my division commander." _Another_ shock. At the end, they sobbed brokenly. But only once. 

"What was the correct action in the scenario involving Corporal Win'ja?" 

"I should have shot her," they screamed, eyes bloodshot and full of hatred, a bright and ethereal blue. Haunting. "I should have executed her and then reported to my division commander." 

"We create order through obedience. Failure to comply is punishable by death." 

There was a long pause. Poe didn't understand why they were shocked over and over after that until the person in the chair began to recite the words themselves. Each time they tripped over a word, they were shocked again. Poe couldn't bear to watch it to completion. He closed it and picked the next file. 

It was another holovid. This one wasn't quite as long. Immediately, Poe knew it was different. There was a range with various targets. He watched the same person flit through the obstacles, shooting each target with unerring accuracy as they progressed. Their long red hair swung behind them in a tight braid. 

The clips were short, but they'd been compiled into one long vid. The shot from the range cut away and a different range was presented. This one was a distance range, and the same person was at one end on their belly with a long-range weapon. They nailed every target, as far as Poe could tell. The next shot was hand-to-hand combat. One on one, then one against two, then one against three, four, five other people. Two against two, two against three, four, five, and so one. Practice maneuvers while in a squadron of nine, then a group of four, then what looked like an entire platoon all moving together. 

Poe closed that file and paused over the next one. It was flagged. He wasn't certain what the little red indicator stood for, but he knew he didn't have much choice but to keep watching. 

When he opened this video, the person was fully dressed in what looked like a Captain's uniform. It wasn't quite the same as the uniforms Poe had seen on First Order soldiers, but it was similar. The insignia was a bit different, the colors different shades. 

The name patch stitched over their heart read Hux, and Poe had to stop the vid. 

He gagged, pressing his fist to his mouth. All that… had been Hux? _His_ Hux? He grabbed the first drive and shoved it into the console beside his, flicking through the personnel files rapidly until he found the last name Hux. Brendol was the first name listed. He was ranked as a General, currently stationed on a dreadnought that patrolled a sector near the core. The second name under 'Hux' was Adrienne. 

Poe sucked in a sharp breath. That was the Hux he knew, but different. Younger. Much longer hair. Softer features. The razor sharp cheekbones were still there, but they were offset by the big, soulful eyes staring at him from the photo, not narrowed in contempt or suspicion or contemplation the way _his_ Hux's eyes always were.

The last time the file had been updated was over ten years ago. Hux had been twenty-three. Poe read the profile information quickly. The last outing Hux had taken part in was listed simply as _failure_. Poe knew there had to be more information somewhere, so he made a note of the dates to look for later. 

He went back to the holovid, his stomach tense with dread. Probably even a bit of fear. He resumed watching, his breath held. 

The angle was such that Poe assumed it was from a security feed. It was high in a corner of the room. Hux - he knew it was Hux, even facing away and with a hat on because he recognized the red braid from the earlier video and the posture - was in the room alone for approximately two seconds. Then two men entered, and Hux stood at attention immediately. 

Poe's eyes narrowed at the vid. That was _Pryde_ , Allegiant General of the First Order. He had tried to kill the man, but he wasn't certain he'd managed it in that last strafing run. 

There was some conversation, but this vid didn't come with sound. Hux nodded, then turned and presented his back to the two men. The one that wasn't Pryde stepped forward, and there was a brief scuffle. Hux crumpled to the ground and didn't move again. Pryde and the other man had to pick him up to drape him over the desk on one side of the room. The second man cuffed Hux's wrists to one of the desk legs, and Poe watched with dawning horror as Prdye began to cut away Hux's clothes. 

It didn't take long for Hux to begin yanking at the cuffs, wriggling all over in an attempt to free himself. Pryde said something that made Hux fall still, and then the other man stepped back into the frame. He was holding a whip. 

Poe pressed his hand tight over his own mouth, his other hand settling on BB-8's head for comfort. He watched as the second man beat Hux ruthlessly, the lash leaving red welts that eventually turned to bloody lines and smears. Hux's face wasn't visible until Pryde grabbed a handful of hair and yanked his head back. Poe wanted to scream at the look of pain and devastation on Hux's tear-stained face, mouth wide open in a silent scream. Pryde lifted the same pair of scissors he'd used to cut off Hux's clothes and began to hack through the thick rope of hair he held. 

It didn't end there, no matter how much Poe wanted it to. He watched as the second man eventually ran out of steam and dropped the whip to the floor, panting. Then Pryde, letting the braid fall to the desk beside Hux's face, stepped around behind Hux and began to fiddle with his trousers. 

Poe didn't want to keep watching. But he couldn't seem to move. He felt like every part of his body was locked firmly into place. 

Hux begged, at first. Poe could read the _pleases_ his mouth formed again and again. But after the first scream, he didn't speak again. He cried, the tears visible even at a distance, but he didn't open his mouth at all. 

When Pryde finished and stepped away, there was blood on his dick and the thighs of his trousers. And then the second man took his place and continued the work Pryde had begun. 

Poe forced himself to move his hand and skip ahead. That portion of the vid lasted three and a half hours, and he felt like he was going to be sick. 

The last portion of the vid showed Hux sitting in a chair facing a camera like the first vid had. He was hollow-eyed. His hair was cropped short, but not quite as short as it was now, and the style was different - wrong in some way Poe didn't have the words to explain. Hux was unmoving. 

"We create order through obedience. Failure to comply is punishable by death." 

Hux repeated it immediately. "We create order through obedience. Failure to comply is punishable by death." 

And again. And again. And again. 

Poe ended the video and ripped the drive from the terminal. He held it in his clenched fist, wanting to crush it under his bootheel. He was shaking, his fist quivering in midair. 

He had no idea how long he sat there. Eventually, Kaydel came over to him and pried the disk - and a description of the contents - from him. She looked horrified, but she didn't destroy it, either. She put it with the others. 

Poe would have been bothered by that a lot more if he didn't think there were probably hundreds of copies of that fucking drive and the holovids it contained elsewhere, on other First Order ships. 


	5. Chapter 5

Hux stood with his back to the door, looking down at the ongoing race outside instead. He took a sip of his wine. The door opened and closed, but he knew who it was. He'd been alerted the moment he'd landed that fucking x-wing of his. 

"How could you?" 

The question was soft, not quite as accusatory or desperate as Hux had expected. He took another sip of wine.

"How - I don't understand. How could you build something like that knowing what sort of damage it could do? How could you sell it to the First Order knowing what they'd do with it?" 

There was clearly no acceptable answer to that question. He had  _ hoped _ Poe wouldn't be too upset over it, or at least that he would be upset with those who used it rather than who built it. He had wanted Poe to understand him better, but he didn't, and Hux supposed that he only had himself to blame. 

"Answer me!" Poe shouted. 

Hux turned slowly. He was resting too much of his weight on his cane. He made an effort to straighten himself as much as he could. 

There was no Mandalorian on the other side of the door to protect him. There was no blaster on his thigh. There was no droid in the room to report whatever may happen. 

If Poe had been sent to kill him, he would die. He had accepted that the moment Poe entered the casino looking as if he were on a warpath. He could, probably, put up a fight and defend himself, but he didn't see the point. 

Techie had almost been killed because of him, and he could never forgive himself.

"I don't know what you expect me to say," Hux said dryly. He took another sip of wine. The glass was nearly empty. He glanced over at the bottle on the table beside him. That was also empty. He looked at Poe. "Do you want me to apologize? Swear off weapons manufacturing forever? Prostrate myself and  _ beg _ ?" He sneered. 

Poe wiped one hand down his face. "No," he said at last. Some of the heat was gone, but he was still angry. "I don't know what I expected of you. You - you're fucking heartless." 

Hux nodded once, looked down at the last of his wine, swirled it around his glass, then drank the last of it. "Yes, I rather suppose I am." He smirked, bitter. "I do think I warned you of that."

He had. When they'd started fucking semi-regularly, he'd told Poe it was nothing more than a means to an end. He didn't trust many people to be physically close to him, and of those, there were a variety of reasons for which they couldn't - or wouldn't - fuck him. So he'd stuck with Poe. The sex was usually quite phenomenal, if a little more vanilla than he preferred, and he knew Poe was too good a person to kill him in his sleep. He had used Poe, and Poe had used him. A mutually beneficial situation. 

Poe looked at him now as if Hux had reached into his chest, ripped out his heart, tossed it on the floor, and stomped on it. 

"Techie almost died, and you're telling me you don't feel anything?" Poe whispered.

Hux threw his glass at him, but he ducked his head to the side to avoid it. 

"We're throwing things now?" Poe asked, sarcastic and bitter. 

"I will  _ never _ forgive myself," Hux said, his voice low and dangerous. "But Techie isn't here. He's on my planet, safe, protected. I'll never let anything happen to him, even if he hates me for it." He took a step forward, swaying. "So do your worst, Commander Dameron. I will not beg."

Poe was frozen in place for a long, tense moment. "You expect me to kill you?" 

"Isn't it obvious," Hux scoffed. "No Mando at the door, no droid in the room, no blaster to defend myself. You have yours." He gestured vaguely at the blaster strapped to Poe's thigh. "Now's your chance. You may never get another."

Once he left Canto Bight, he was going to his own planet in the Unknown Region. He didn't plan on leaving again. It would take quite a lot, anyway. 

"You're drunk," Poe said, his eyes narrowing. "You - you're  _ shitfaced _ ." He pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head. "No. I am  _ not _ doing this right now. I can't. You - you don't give a shit anyway, do you? Not about me, not about yourself, not about anything but those fucking weapons."

"And my brother," Hux confirmed with a nod.

Poe pointed a finger at him, stepping forward. "No. No, see, you really don't, because if you did? You wouldn't have built something that could blow up  _ half the fucking galaxy in one go _ , or even if you did, you wouldn't have sold it. You wouldn't be standing there, defenceless, waiting for someone to come along and fucking kill you! If you really cared about him, you wouldn't leave him  _ alone _ ." 

Hux had nothing to say in response to that. Techie would hurt for a while, perhaps, but he'd get over it. And as long as he didn't leave the planet he was currently installed upon, he never had to worry about anyone finding him and hurting him. The planet itself had more defenses than the entirety of the First Order, the New Republic, and the Resistance put together. And there was the Mandalorian, as well, paid twice his own weight in Beskar. No one would ever touch Techie again. 

"I can't believe I fucking liked you," Poe said, disbelief evident in his tone. "I can't - I can't believe I fucked you." 

"What are you waiting for?" Hux asked, bored with that line of conversation. He didn't want to hear about what Poe might have once felt for him. It was tedious and unnecessary. "If you've been sent here to shoot me, then get it over with already. I am quite tired of waiting." 

He was tired in general. 

He hadn't slept in a week. 

Poe looked at him with soft, rounded eyes full of sadness. "I wasn't sent here to kill you," he said quietly. 

Hux scoffed and turned to make his way to the bar. He tripped over the end of his own cane. Everything was swimming a bit more than he'd expected. He felt Poe's arms close around him and guide him to his chair. He sat, but he looked longingly at the bar. 

"Then why did you come?" Hux asked, remembering belatedly what Poe had just said. he blinked and looked over at Poe, who had moved to sit on the couch beside his chair. It was where Techie usually sat. 

"To see if Techie was okay," Poe admitted. "To check on you. To… I don't know. I wanted to know why you'd build something like that." He shrugged. "I just don't understand…" He bit his lip and looked away. "We stole some data files from Starkiller base. I saw some of what happened to you at the Academy." He looked up and met Hux's eyes. "I guess I just can't understand why you'd still sell to the First Order, still support them, after what they did to you."

Hux smiled. "How could I not?" 

Poe nodded and stood. "Right. Got it. Well." He turned away from Hux and walked toward the door, only to turn around again and face him. "You aren't okay. I can see that. But I don't have time for this." He gestured between them. He turned and went all the way to the door this time, even going so far as to open it. Then he stopped and turned again. "I'm sorry for what happened to you. I know that probably doesn't mean anything to you, but I am. I hope Techie's all right. Have a nice life, Hux." 

And then he was gone, the door shut quietly behind him. 

Hux stared at it for a long, long time, unmoving. 


	6. Chapter 6

When he arrived on the planet he'd been calling home for nearly ten years, Techie met him by his ship. He hugged him, first. Then he took a step back and punched Hux in the face. He was crying, his face red and wet and ugly. 

"You don't get to do this to me," Techie shouted, slamming the note Hux had handwritten for him against Hux's chest. "You don't get to leave me like that!" He bunched his fists in Hux's pristine suit, rumpling it. "You can't."

"I won't," Hux promised quietly, wrapping his arms around Techie and pulling him close. "I won't." 

He didn't apologize. 

Techie noticed.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bad things happen bingo square N5 - Choking

Kylo Ren held him against the wall. One hand was curled around Hux's damaged thigh, keeping it in place high on his hip. The other hand was on Hux's hip. The Force was crushing Hux's throat to the point where he saw stars every time Kylo plowed into him. He suspected the Force was also doing most of the work keeping him pinned to the wall. He found he didn't mind. 

Sex with Kylo wasn't quite as good as sex with Poe had been, even if it was more along the lines of what Hux wanted. 

He didn't know why.


	8. Chapter 8

The First Order and the New Republic were trying to negotiate trade routes. Kylo Ren was less concerned about blowing up the galaxy than he was actually ruling the bits of it he had conquered. Naturally, Hux and his weapons and resources were part of these negotiations. He didn't often leave his little planet, but he had to, occasionally. He still had to do business, and he didn't allow anyone to enter his system of planets or even know where they were precisely located. 

But, as he was leaving a meeting with the First Order, his transport ship was attacked by Resistance fighters. He managed to get out of the ship on an escape pod before it imploded, but that put him in the exact position of landing on a Resistance base or dying in space. 

He landed rather roughly, but he wasn’t injured beyond a few bruises. He was unsurprised to find a small squadron of Resistance fighters tromping through the brush toward his escape pod. He didn’t bother to unholster his blaster. There wasn’t much point. He stood exactly where he was, unmoving and unwilling to move until they got close. They were wary of him, and he didn’t blame them for their caution. He was fully aware of the rumors people spread about him. 

“Armitage Hux, on behalf of the Resistance, we are placing you under arrest for crimes against the New Republic and the galaxy at large,” one brave soul dared to announce, stepping forward ahead of the rest of the group. “Please step down from the escape pod and surrender your blaster and any other weapons.”

Hux wanted to remind them that he’d sold them half of their fleet - including their medical frigate - and that he may not be part of the Resistance or the New Republic, but neither was he part of the First Order. Besides, he’d been the one to give them the schematics for Starkiller so they could destroy it. He wasn’t their enemy, and he knew he couldn’t very well be charged for the war crimes for which they were blaming him. 

“The least you could do is offer some assistance,” he said instead, voice dry and just a little bit bitter. He used his cane to indicate his bad leg, and the Resistance fighters immediately looked uncomfortable for a very different reason. Hux hated their pity. One of them finally came close enough to grip Hux’s arm as he did his best to remain composed while he stepped from the escape pod, all his weight on his bad leg for an entirely too-long moment. They took his blaster but left him alone, otherwise, not even bothering with cuffs. Which was probably beneficial, considering Hux was limping badly and resting too much of his weight on his cane. If they’d cuffed him or taken the cane, they’d have had to carry him, and he very much doubted anyone wanted to suffer that particular indignity, least of all him.

The walk back to their base was torturously long. He was clenching his teeth and sweating by the time the base was in view, and he wasn’t looking forward to the rest of the walk. 

Someone finally took mercy on him and called in for a transport unit to carry him the rest of the way. He took them up on their offer, knowing he looked far more composed riding on a transport unit as compared to suffering in the blasted heat and humidity as he limped his way along. He wasted a brief thought on wishing they’d supply him with a healthy dose of painkillers as well as the transport ride, but he dismissed it just as quickly, knowing there was no point to it. 

He was dropped right at the front doors to their base, and he couldn’t help but wonder if they knew he would remember everything to the last detail. He certainly wasn’t going to tell them. He had to walk into the base, and he paid close attention to everything as he was led deeper into the facility. Several minutes later, he was shown into a room and the door was promptly locked behind him. He sighed softly and settled himself in an uncomfortable, plain, wooden chair.

There was very little in the room. A desk beside the chair in which he’d seated himself. Another chair beside the door. A small terminal that had been disabled. The idiots who had locked him in the room hadn’t thought to search him for a comm unit and take it away. He took it from his coat pocket and began fiddling with it, letting Techie know he would be quite late to get back to him and asking the Mandalorian in charge of Techie’s safety to ensure the security protocols were being followed. That done, he began relaying design ideas for Phasma to Techie, having his brother store them and even do some mock-ups to figure out what might work best. 

He’d been visiting her again, checking in on her progress. She’d been caught in a nasty explosion when some Resistance fighters had boarded her ship. She’d lived, but the explosion and fall and subsequently being crushed under a large chunk of twisted metal had taken both her legs and one each of her arms and eyes. He had already promised to begin work as soon as he could for replacements that were better than the trash the First Order had offered. He had designs for bionic eyes already, after all. His and Techie’s eyes were better than anything else in the galaxy as far as prosthetics went. Techie was pleased to help with this sort of project. He didn’t much like assisting with Hux’s weapons designs, but he always lent a hand if Hux asked. 

Hours passed, and he wasn’t entirely convinced they hadn’t forgotten about him.

Eventually, there was a soft knock on the door to the room. He stood, trying not to lean on his cane quite as much as he had earlier. His thigh was still screaming at him, but he wanted easier access to the blade concealed within the cane if he needed it. He hoped he wouldn’t, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t prepare himself. 

“May I come in?” 

Hux frowned at the door. He recognized that voice. It was the girl Poe had brought with him to Canto Bight the one time. Rey. “Seeing as this is your base and I am your prisoner, I don’t see why you need my permission in the first place.”

There was an awkward pause. “Well, if you don’t want me -”

“Very well, enter,” Hux said, rolling his eyes. The girl opened the door while carrying a tray of food and a pitcher of water. 

“Hullo,” she said, flashing him a tight smile. She moved close enough to deposit the tray and pitcher on the desk and then backed toward the door. “I hope you’ve been treated all right?”

“Considering I’m supposedly being held as a war criminal, yes,” Hux said dryly. “Although the lack of a 'fresher might become a problem in the future.” He waved a hand toward the food and water. Rey went pink, and he thought it was rather sweet, in a way, her innocence. 

“We’ll get that sorted,” she said with a nod. She gestured to the chair in the corner by the door. “May I sit?” 

“You may do whatever you like,” he said, “as I am your prisoner and not the other way around.” He didn’t say that he never took prisoners. He doubted very much that he wasn’t being monitored somehow, and he knew the words would probably misconstrued, at least in some way. Rey sat, and he could tell she was just a little bit nervous to be in the same room as him. Probably, she was attempting to get a read on his thoughts using the Force, but he’d learned long ago - with Snoke, first, and later Kylo Ren - how to block out such attempts. Kylo had helped him get better at it. Surface impressions were easy to glean, but anything more, anything of importance, he kept to himself. 

“How - um. How’s Techie?” She shifted a bit in her seat, her hands clenching together between her thighs. 

“Well enough,” Hux answered. “Rather irritated with me because I won’t let him go off on his own any longer, but he’s safe and healthy.” That was, in the end, all that mattered. Hux would rather have Techie hate him than allow any harm to befall him. It was a risk he had accepted long ago. 

She smiled just a little and rubbed at her wrist. “I’m glad he’s all right. We got on well, last time I saw him.”

“Yes, he told me,” Hux agreed, nodding. “He was rather pleased with the tinkering the pair of you did. He said it helped with the speeder he was building for his tech conference.” He didn’t mention Hosnian Prime. He didn’t bring up Starkiller. He was hoping she didn’t know about Techie being on Hosnian Prime when it was nearly destroyed by Starkiller. He didn’t want to be questioned about it. Not by anyone, really, but certainly not by this young girl who was only just beginning to learn how the galaxy worked. 

“Oh. Good.” She pinked up a little again. “I’m glad I could help, I guess.” She fiddled with her wrist again, and Hux caught sight of the bracelet her wrist, made into a flower and vine pattern from copper wires. 

"Techie must have given you that," he said, nodding at her wrist. He would rather have meaningless conversation about his brother than reveal anything to this girl without getting information in return. She'd probably been sent as a sort of test to see how cooperative he would be. He thought was doing admirably. 

She nodded and revealed all of it. It was one of Techie's more intricate pieces. Hux reached into his pocket and took out the small model of an akk dog Techie had given him just before he left. He'd already given Phasma the can-cell Techie had made for her. He tossed the akk dog to Rey, who caught it easily. 

"You can keep that one," Hux said quietly. "Techie will be pleased." 

She clutched it close to her chest. "Thank you." She opened her mouth as if to say something, then closed it again and stood abruptly. "Thank you," she repeated, and then she left the room. 

Hux blinked once at the door, then he shrugged. She could leave if she liked. He ignored the food entirely, but he did drink a glass of water. He doubted any of it was drugged or poisoned, but it was far harder to drug or poison water without his noticing, and he wasn't exactly hungry anyway. 

He was starting to miss his stims, though.


	9. Chapter 9

“Dameron has just landed, ma’am,” D’Acy reported, poking at her terminal. “I’ve told the ground crew to let him know he needs to come see you immediately.” 

Leia nodded and thanked her quietly and moved toward her office where there was a bank of terminals. One of her monitors showed the live feed for the room where Hux had been placed. It was unfortunate that her people had shot him down in a place where he was forced to land on their planet so they could arrest him. A part of her wished they'd just killed him instead. Having him alive was a much bigger hassle. 

The newly constructed Senate would never condemn him for his part in Starkiller. He had only built the weapon. He had even offered it to the Resistance first. They had chosen not to take it, to allow him to sell it to someone else. And he hadn't fired the damn thing. He had _also_ provided the schematics to the Resistance to destroy it, even if his reasons had been selfish. He could not be charged, convicted, or killed for crimes he technically did not commit, even if the sheer horror at his ability to build a weapon like Starkiller was enough to make Leia see red. All she could hear and feel were the tormented and terrified screams of Alderaan. 

She was hoping Poe could talk to him, get some information from him, before they were forced to release him and let him go home - wherever home was. Her primary concern was that Hux had a second Starkiller lurking somewhere in the Unknown Reaches. If they could glean any further information, like what he might have been selling to the First Order before her men shot him down, then that was a bonus as well. She would make the best of this situation.

She was worried, also. Hux and Poe had some sort of intimate relationship with one another. How would Poe handle being told to interrogate him? She knew it had been a while since Poe had gone to see Hux, but this was partly a test for Poe as well. Where would he place his loyalties now that he was going to be forced to choose? Poe was probably the only person who could get any answers out of Hux - but would he even try?

She hoped he would. 

When Poe arrived in her office, she turned the monitor to show him Hux. She watched his breath catch and the way he tried to hide a pained grimace. 

"What's going on?" He sounded wary. Leia didn't blame him. 

"Some of the others saw Hux leaving a First Order ship. They shot him down in range of the planet and he crashed here. We have him in custody, and I'd like for you to interrogate him. You have history." 

Poe wiped one hand down his face. "Not that kind of history, but sure. Whatever. I'll go talk to him. What am I asking about?" 

"What he's sold to the First Order since the trade negotiations began," Leia answered immediately. Poe nodded like he expected that. She felt her face harden. "And if he has a second Starkiller." Poe's expression flickered for a moment. She couldn't quite tell what it had revealed without using the Force to read Poe's mind, and she didn't want to do that to him without permission. 

"I'll ask," Poe said quietly. He abandoned his helmet on her desk. "Which room is he in?"

"Rey will show you the way and stand guard." Poe didn't argue, and Leia sat in the chair behind her desk. 

It took several minutes before Hux stood again at the sound of a knock on the door. She had been surprised by his manners when Rey had gone to see him earlier. She had also been surprised by his kindness. She'd rather bought into the rumors that he was a ruthless, hateful, nasty person. 

Poe opened the door, and Hux's face fell into a mask of neutrality. "Poe," he said with a stiff nod. 

"Hey," Poe said with a nod of his own. He slumped down in the chair by the door after shutting it tight behind himself. "So. Heard they saw you leaving a First Order ship." 

Hux was silent for a long moment. Too long, Leia thought. "There was some sort of mission the Resistance was working when the ship they were on blew up. I don't know all the details, and I don't care to. All I know is that Phasma was badly injured. She is missing two legs, an arm, and an eye. I was promising her an eye." He tapped his cheek just under his own eye. "Since I'm familiar with the technology and I can build her something better than the garbage the First Order will offer her. I did speak briefly with Kylo Ren, but I told him, as I am telling you now, that I no longer manufacture and sell weapons." 

Poe was frozen in place for a long moment. Leia watched his jaw work as he thought of something to say. "Why?" was all he could choke out. 

"I grew bored with it," Hux said arrogantly, and Leia knew that part was a lie even from this distance.

"It - it was because of Techie, wasn't it? Because he almost died." Hux didn't answer, but the way his lip tried to curl on one side was answer enough. Poe scraped his hand through his hair, and he was so rough about it that Leia's own scalp twinged in sympathy.

They stood across the room from each other, tense with irritation and anger. Leia sighed. This wasn’t getting anyone anywhere. How could Poe trust that Hux wasn’t manufacturing and selling weapons any longer based solely on his say-so? She wanted to yank Poe out of the room and go in herself to grill Hux with questions, but she knew that wasn’t an option. Hux would clam up and refuse to speak with her if he so much as saw her, she was sure.

“Just - just sit down, would you?” Poe asked, sounded tired and a little worried. She narrowed her eyes at the projection in front of her, and she realized that Hux was trembling slightly. He threw Poe a dirty look, but he did sit down in the same chair as before, settling his cane against the desk beside himself. Poe sat, also, sighing and rubbing at his face. “So, medical tech then? You're not making any more weapons?" Hux nodded, and Poe sneered a bit. “What, can’t think of anything flashier - bigger? A weapon that can take out _multiple_ systems instead of just one?”

"Don't." 

"It wasn't just a matter of showing off, or even of making something that you could be proud of. You knew there was only one place you could have sold something like that. You sold it to them, and you knew what it did, and I am still trying to get why, because maybe if I do, I won't have to be so _angry_ all the time. Or worry that you might be building another one."

Leia was uncomfortably glad that he had finally gotten around to the point - to the entire reason she’d sent him in there. She didn’t like how hurt he sounded, how utterly devastated he was. She was too familiar with Poe as a person who was happy-go-lucky in the worst of situations, able to plaster on a smile and bolster spirits no matter how dark things seemed. 

“I mean, how could you, Hux? How could you build something like that knowing what the First Order would do with it?” She hated how broken the question sounded, and probably not for the reason she should have hated it. Hux was a weakness for Poe, and considering their relative positions, that was exceedingly dangerous. 

Hux’s eyes narrowed, and she felt just a little bit justified. People usually spewed the truth when they were angry. “I am a weapons manufacturer, what the fuck else am I supposed to do? I don’t give two fucks what happens to the galaxy as long as me and mine are taken care of.” She was genuinely startled to hear him curse. For some reason, she’d never thought he would be the type. Too poised, too controlled. 

“Guess I really don’t count as yours, huh?” Leia knew then that sending him in there had been a mistake. He was too wounded by whatever had occurred between them. 

“You never wanted that.” Hux sounded downright frigid, and Leia grimaced. 

“I guess I don’t count as yours if I’m not wearing your collar.” Poe stood again and turned his back on Hux. He put one hand on the door, prepared to walk out. “How can you still believe in the First Order? After everything they’ve done to you?” 

Hux was quiet for a moment, but just as Poe was about to write off the conversation as a loss and leave, he began to speak. "My father was the one who began the Stormtrooper program currently in use. A version of it, anyhow. He wasn't making enough progress, so he began to experiment with different techniques. Using me. I perfected the program, and then they altered it anyway. How can I not believe in the First Order when I've been conditioned into it since I was six years old? Besides. The First Order under Kylo Ren is prospering. Their people are not suffering or starving. Can you say the same for yours?"

Leia knew he couldn’t, and she was glad he left the room without engaging with him again. It was the best he could do in that situation. Rey made it back to her first, and she shook her head, lips pressed together in a firm line. Hux hadn’t been lying, then. There was something else in the girl’s expression, but Leia wouldn’t grill her about it. Not now. She had to deal with Poe, instead, and that was bound to be an uphill battle.

Several minutes passed before he made it to her office, and she used the time to reevaluate things. Hux was no longer supplying the First Order with weapons, and that was ultimately going to work in their favor. The First Order was perfectly capable of crafting their own machines of death and horror, but Hux’s creations were of an entirely new league. Knowing he had moved on to other pursuits, at least for the time being, was a relief more than anything else. The Resistance had made use of Hux’s creations as well, certainly, but - they had their morals, their principles. The First Order did not. A First Order under Snoke, anyhow. The same wasn’t necessarily true of a First Order led by Kylo Ren. 

She sighed heavily and leaned back in her chair, looking up at the ceiling. She caught movement on the screen, and she frowned at it. Hux was hunched over, both hands pressed to his face, his shoulders shaking slightly. She could hear the quick, in-drawn breaths. It wasn't quite crying, but it wasn't _not_ crying, either. When Hux dropped his hands, his eyes were rimmed red, but there were no tears. Poe would be at her office in seconds. 

Now it was time for her to make a decision. 

"What happened between the two of you?" she asked quietly, gently. Poe dropped into the chair across her desk without asking, and she let it happen without remark. 

"We fought," he said with a shrug. "Over Starkiller, mostly." Poe wasn't looking at her, wasn't looking at the feed from Hux's room. "I said some pretty mean things, I guess. He was basically trying to use me to commit suicide. He was really, really drunk. I left him there." 

Leia was surprised no one else had come along to kill Hux. It was probably only fear that kept people at bay. She wasn't sure if she should be grateful he was still alive or not. That indecision was one more small weight on her already stooped shoulders. 

"It's been more than a year since the destruction of Starkiller," Leia said. "You're still angry with him?"

"You're damn right I'm still angry," Poe snapped at her, glancing up only long enough to get his point across before looking at the wall. "He built that thing. He's a fucking _monster_." 

"Is he?" Leia asked quietly. She folded her hands on her desk and sighed. "He built it, yes. But he offered it to you, first. He offered to let the Resistance have it. Owning it didn't mean using it. We could have kept it as a base and never once fired that canon. You said no, Poe. You made that choice. I trust you to make those decisions, and I am not saying this to make you regret it now. But it was Allegiant General Pryde who made the decision to fire that canon. He chose the Hosnian system. He made that choice." She pressed her lips into a thin line and watched as Poe thought about that. "He also chose to send a Dreadnought to Hosnian Prime in order to bomb it, later, and we we unable to stop it. Which, if I recall, is the reason you were so insistent on blowing up the other Dreadnought." Poe refused to meet her eyes. She didn't blame him for it. 

She took a deep breath and let it out in a controlled exhale. "Think about it this way. You were a spice runner. For years. You, who were raised in the heart of the Resistance. You, who worked for the same Hutt cartels that once enslaved me and tried to kill my brother and the father of my child." She paused long enough for that to sink in before continuing. "I forgave you for that. I never held it against you. I knew you were just doing what you thought you had to do. When you came back to the Resistance, I was just happy you had found your way." 

Poe nodded to that, his shoulders unwinding from their tense position. He glanced at her again, but he could still see the projection of Hux, so he looked away again. Leia ignored the projection with long practice. 

"I don't like Hux. I don't believe I'll ever understand what you feel towards him. But all the same..." She paused for a moment, looking for the exact right thing to say. She'd been a diplomat nearly her whole life, and she still found it difficult sometimes. It didn't help that she didn't particularly enjoy manipulating those few people she liked. But... she needed Poe to get Hux on their side, at least as much as possible, more than anything else. And a Hux who had already given up weapons manufacturing was a Hux who was likely searching for connections. It was not beneath her to send Poe to him to get what she wanted out of Hux, even if Poe didn't realize what he was doing for her, for the Resistance. It was probably better that he _didn't_ know. "He made you happy once, didn't he?" Poe hesitated, then nodded. "Maybe he can do that again. He's told you he's decided to change direction. Go with him. We destroyed his ship, so the least we can do is take him home. Do that for him. Let him prove to you that he has a different focus now. You can check in on his brother while you're there." 

Poe's shoulders slumped. "Yeah, fine, okay." He nodded a little and looked up. Something in the projection caught his attention, and he went white as a sheet. Leia studied it as well. Hux was mouthing something over and over, but she couldn't make out what it was. 

"What's he saying?" she asked. She checked, and the audio was still good for the room. Hux was dead silent, though. 

"Order through obedience," Poe recited blankly. He looked at her, eyes shadowed. "I've - I've seen him do that before. In some holovids of the old Stormtrooper program." He took a slow, deep breath. "He mentioned it." Leia nodded. "It was just torture, Leia. That's all it was. Electroshock and other physical and mental torture. I saw some of it. There was a data drive. One we recovered from Starkiller. I… I bet Kaydel could find it for you." 

Leia shook her head. "I don't need to see that." She would take Poe at his word on that one. It had clearly had a profound effect on him, anyhow, and she didn't have the time, besides. "It's not surprising, is it? You've heard the things Finn has told us, what little he's told us."

"I asked Finn about it, after I saw those holovids," Poe admitted. "He said that once Hux graduated, he was kept at the Academy. He changed things. Had a few platoons to himself. Something like half died before they finished the program. And once Hux left the First Order, someone else stepped in and changed all of it. Finn said he never got the worst of it. He was too young for the really nasty stuff when Hux was there, and by the time he was older, it had all changed. He wasn't tortured like that. He was horrified by what I told him. So just - imagine it." Poe chuckled, but it wasn't funny. "I had made a joke, at the time. Because Finn made a comment about how Hux designed a portion of the Stormtrooper training. I said something about that being the only thing Hux had ever designed that had failed. Finn got real serious and told me it was because someone else went behind him and fucked it all up. That's how Finn was able to subvert their conditioning. Hux… Hux never stood a fucking chance."

"And yet look at him now," she gestured to the projection. Hux was still muttering to himself, but he wasn't crying, and there was less redness around his eyes. "He may not be a very good person, but he doesn't work directly for the First Order anymore. They made him, but they also broke him." She hesitated for a moment, then stood and walked around her desk. She took Poe's hand in her own. "You can have a place in his life if you want it, Poe. You'll have to fight for it. Carve it out bit by bit. But just think about it, would you? He offered everything to _you_ first. Starkiller. Knowledge of his baby brother. His _life_. You're important to him, and it doesn't take the Force to tell me that." She had the feeling that she was sending one of her very best fighters into the belly of a beast, but she would make that sacrifice if it meant they had Hux on their side. It was a long game, but she was skilled at those after all this time.

She wished she could have sent Poe after her son insisted, wished Rey was more receptive -- but, well. There was no use for that, not now. She knew better. Hux wasn't who she wanted on their side, but they absolutely needed him. Leia could accept that. 

Poe glanced away from the projection to stare at her for a moment. He nodded once, sharp. "Right. Okay." He squeezed her hand and stood. "I'm gonna - go." 

She gave him a soft smile. "Go. And tell him you'll take him home, hm? We don't need you around here for a while." She winked. He forced a weak-looking smile, but he didn't try to retort, just left.

Rey slipped into her office after he was gone, and Leia turned off the projection to give them some privacy. "Were you able to get any sort of read off him?"

"Not much," Rey admitted, "but I spoke to Kylo. Hux really was there only to visit Phasma. They've been friends since they were children, apparently. Something happened when Hux left the First Order that she's one of the only people who knows about. He thinks he owes her his life or something, according to Kylo." Rey shrugged. "When he and Hux spoke, it was only in passing, and only about some sort of mines Hux has access to that the First Order wants. Hux really is serious about not selling them anymore weapons. He sold them some designs for some upgraded TIE fighters just before the trade talks began, but that was all."

Leia hummed thoughtfully. "Interesting. Well, for now, we'll leave him be. Poe is going to take Hux to his home planet. I believe I promised you some time away as well. Go on. You can leave, too. I just have trade negotiations. I expect you'll be around for those, anyhow." 

Rey turned pink, but she nodded. "Yes, ma'am, I will be. Thanks." She darted closer and gave Leia a quick hug. "I'll see you soon." Leia smiled and let her rush off. 

It hurt, that Rey could run off to see her son and she had to set up trade negotiations to do the same. But Kylo Ren wasn't really her son, and she knew that. A part of her had accepted Ben's death a long time ago. She was glad Snoke was dead. She was glad Rey and Kylo could be happy together. She was glad, in a small way, that Kylo had lived. He wasn't her son, but he was a _part_ of him.

In the end, she and Snoke had been the ones to kill Ben Solo, not Kylo Ren, and she had to accept that, as well.


	10. Chapter 10

By the time Poe made it to Hux's room, Hux had pulled himself together. Mostly. He was still a little red around the eyes and a little too unnaturally still, but he wasn't hunched over himself repeating those same awful words again and again. 

Hux looked surprised to see Poe back again so soon. Poe left the door open. "Come on, you're free to go. I'm going to take you home. Or… wherever you want to go, I guess. Canto Bight." Poe shrugged. He'd only ever met Hux in his rooms in Canto Bight, but he wondered what Hux's home planet looked like. He knew Hux had pretty much founded and terraformed it himself. He could only ever picture the rooms from Canto Bight in his mind, though. 

Hux stood, slow and unsteady, leaning too much on his cane, and stood very still for a long moment. "Very well," Hux said, sounding hollow and empty. Poe made to step closer to give Hux his arm, but Hux flinched away from him, and Poe felt his heart crush into a small rock in his chest. He stood out in the hall instead and waited for Hux to move slowly out to meet him.

"I'm sorry," Poe whispered once they were both headed for the hangar. "I know - I know that doesn't mean much, but I am." Hux didn't respond. "For the record? I really did always want to be yours. I just. I thought you couldn't see me that way." 

Hux kept his silence, and Poe dropped the subject. He figured he deserved it. He was surprised to see Leia out by one of the slightly better transport ships. Poe walked over that direction, with Hux following behind with slow, painful, shuffling steps. 

"Hux," Leia said with a nod. 

"General Organa," Hux nodded in return, still sounding small and tired. Poe didn't like it. He wanted Hux to sound cold and haughty again. "To what do I owe the pleasure?" 

"Just one final question," Leia said. She looked at Hux hard, and Poe got the feeling she was using the Force on him. "Did you build a second Starkiller?"

"Are you commissioning one?" Hux asked, one pale, red eyebrow raised. When Leia didn't respond, Hux scoffed. "No, I didn't build a second. They're quite expensive, you know. And rather large. The size of a small planet, if you haven't seen the schematics. I didn't have the resources to build a second one. Still don't, if I'm perfectly honest." He stared at her, head-on. 

"Thank you for your honesty," Leia said. She nodded and stepped to the side. "Poe, I've told Admiral D'Acy to let you have this ship for your trip." She glanced at Hux. "It isn't the most glamorous." 

"It'll get us there just fine," Poe said, patting the side. "Thank you, ma'am." It was better than his x-wing, which wouldn't be comfortable for Hux and would be far too difficult for him to get in and out. "Anyone know where BB-8 ran off to?"

"He's on his way!" Kaydel called from somewhere off to the left. Poe raised his hand in acknowledgement and offered her a small smile. She and D'Acy had just gotten married, and he was happy for her - over the moon for her - but he was just a tiny bit jealous, too. He'd never get anything like that, not with anyone (and certainly not with Hux). 

Poe walked up the ramp and headed for the cockpit, settling into the pilot's chair and fiddling with everything to get the ship ready for takeoff. BB-8 came to chirp animatedly at him about their companion on the ship and their trip before Hux made it to the cockpit to settle into the copilot's chair. Poe said nothing about it, figuring Hux had some sort of reason for wanting to be there. He wasn't going to argue, even if he was certain the copilot's chair wasn't the most comfortable place for him with his bad leg. 

"Okay, BB-8, get ready, buddy," Poe said, not sounding particularly cheerful but calling out the warning anyway. BB-8 made a soft whirring noise at him, his way of questioning what was wrong while also consenting to magentizing himself to the floor so he didn't roll around too much. Poe didn't answer him. He just focused on maneuvering the ship out of the hangar and into the atmosphere.

He finally looked to Hux once they were in open space. "Where am I taking you?"

Hux was silent for a long moment. He finally reached into his coat pocket for his comm unit. He sent a set of coordinates to the ship's navigation system. It was for a planet in the Unknown Region. Poe nodded and began the jump to lightspeed. It would take almost a day for them to travel that far. As soon as the autopilot was set and locked - and double checked - he abandoned his spot at the pilot's chair and went to the back to check their provisions. If Leia had told him to take this ship, he imagined there was enough, but he needed to make sure in case they had to make a stop somewhere along the way. 

Hux followed him, thumping along slowly with his cane. He settled on the small, lumpy couch in the lounge area, and Poe could hear him speaking softly to BB-8 as he went through the cupboards in the canteen. Everything was well-stocked for several days worth of food, Poe was pleased to note. None of it was particularly good, but he hadn't expected that anyhow.

He went back toward the lounge and leaned against the frame separating the two areas, his arms crossed over his chest. Hux was rubbing his bad leg repetitively, his eyes unfocused as he stared at the wall across from him. Poe cleared his throat, and Hux's attention snapped over to him.

"Want me to rub your leg for you?" he offered. He'd done it before - several times, in fact. They'd been a lot closer when he'd done it before, though. Had been seeing each other fairly regularly. 

Hux smirked. "Always looking for an excuse to get your hands on me." 

Poe shook his head. "Not this time. You're hardly in any condition for that." And Poe didn't really think he deserved sex from Hux, not after the way he'd treated him. He crossed the small space and knelt on the floor in front of him. "Please?" He held his hands up, hovering over Hux's bad leg, but he didn't touch him. Hux looked down at him for a long moment, one hand clenched in a white-knuckled grasp on his cane, before he finally nodded. Poe offered him a small smile and dropped both hands, one on either side of Hux's thigh, and began to gently massage the muscle. It was easier without Hux's trousers in the way, but he wasn't going to bring that up. 

Things were quiet for a long moment. BB-8 beeped at them a couple times before wandering off to go do something else. Hux sighed very softly and shifted his leg a little to give Poe more room, and Poe's chest ached. He knew Hux had been hurting, but he hadn't thought it was that bad. He wondered if there was anything on the ship he could offer him that would help - and if Hux would take it. He could figure it out once he was done. 

"I never told you how this happened," Hux said, his voice barely above a murmur. Poe shook his head. He had to admit, he was still curious. Even after seeing those terrible holovids. "I'd graduated from the Academy very young, and they'd given me control over a platoon of stormtroopers. I was tasked with improving the conditioning and ensuring the stormtroopers were able to perform at the quality we expected of them while also retaining loyalty. There were too many flaws in the program at the time, and they were still using stolen children from various conquered worlds as their soldiers. So I began to make changes. I was… highly successful. It was unprecedented, compared to what my predecessors had done. My stormtroopers performed eighty to one hundred and twenty percent better in every field, and the rate of reconditioning was the lowest they'd ever seen. But it was difficult, too. The stormtroopers died. Or they killed each other. Or they killed themselves. Less than half completed my program, I'm told, but of those that did, ninety percent hold high-ranking positions." He smiled faintly, but he wasn't looking at Poe.

"If you were doing so well, why'd you leave?" Poe asked.

"I'd been in that particular position for a few years. I should have been promoted, and I was making noise about it. Questioning things. I had rather a lot of friends in high places. I was tasked for one last test. Supposedly, it was to prove the abilities of my stormtroopers. They were… all so young, still. And I was their squad leader. And I did as I was told. A routine training exercise, on-planet. One meant for a graduating class, but one I knew my troopers could handle with ease. 

"The moment we landed, I knew I'd been set up. Someone had set a trap for us, had lured Kell dragons to our landing spot. We were ambushed. That wasn't the end of it, though. I lost only two of my squad of nine to twelve dragons. The rest of us survived with minor injuries. I told them we were to continue with the training exercise. The falleens were next. We lost three to them. They lured my troopers away and then bit off their heads. There were five of us left, then, and that's when we were attacked. Twi'lek mercenaries. There were… dozens of them." Hux fell quiet for a moment. Poe didn't stop rubbing his thigh. 

"I watched the last of my troopers die as I sent out a distress signal. I'd sent one after the falleens, of course, but… I didn't get any response. I should have been in constant contact with _someone_ from the ship we'd come from, but there was nothing. I was the last left alive. I'd killed all the Twi'leks, but. One of them must have set the missile before I shot them. I'm still not certain." Hux shrugged. "It exploded near their ship. The debris took my eyes. One of them had shot me, as well. I was blinded and I could not walk. It took nearly two days for Phasma to find me." 

"You were set up to die," Poe said grimmly. Hux nodded. "Did you ever find out who it was?" 

"Allegiant General Pryde and Grand Admiral Brooks," Hux said without hesitation. "They'd taken a liking to me when I was still in the Academy. I…" Hux swallowed. "I thought it would be worth it, as long as they kept their word and promoted me. They didn't, and others began to notice and wonder why I'd been left to stagnate. I'd become too much of a liability for them. So they decided to have me killed." Hux smirked, brittle and _angry_. "They didn't expect my troopers were so well trained, or I probably would have died. But once the First Order had given me new eyes, I left. I didn't give them the opportunity to try to kill me again. It wasn't worth the risk." 

"What about your family?" Poe asked, frowning and more than a little upset. "Your father is still really high up in command, right? Couldn't he have done something?"

Hux snorted, and Poe felt cold. "For a bastard like me? A _perversion_ he wanted nothing to do with? No. He'd sanctioned my death. Gave Pryde and Brooks all the permission they wanted for whatever they wanted to do." 

"Fuck," Poe whispered, one of his hands falling to circle Hux's ankle and squeeze tightly. "I - I'm sorry." He pressed his forehead to Hux's knee. "Mostly I'm just sorry that last shot I made at Pryde didn't take him out." 

Poe felt Hux's fingers in his hair, and it felt like a benediction he didn't deserve. "I'm grateful you tried." 

"Close only counts in hand grenades," Poe said with a strained chuckle. He sighs quietly. "I wish it had been one of them on that Dreadnought we blew up. Would make the whole thing seem a little more worth it…"

"Hmm?" Hux asked, combing his fingers through Poe's hair. Poe felt guilty. He felt like he should have been the one comforting Hux after sharing something like that. Hux had never been the type to need or accept comfort, though, and Poe - well. Poe both needed and appreciated it. 

He lifted his head and shifted between Hux's legs, resting his head against Hux's non-injured thigh. "Few months back, before Ren killed Snoke and took over, we took out a Dreadnought. Cost us a lot of good people, but we did it."

"Which one?" Hux asked, going very still. Poe shrugged. "Can you find out?"

"BB-8!" Poe called. He heard BB-8 chirp and come rolling toward them from the back of the ship. He didn't ask what the little droid had been doing. "Which Dreadnought did we take out?" 

BB-8 beeped his answer in binary, and Hux's eyes went wide with surprise. 

"You - you killed Brooks," he breathed. He looked at Poe, his mechanical pupils the size of pinpricks. "You mad, _beautiful_ -" 

Hux bent low and crushed his lips to Poe's, his hand tangling in Poe's hair to keep him in place. He slid off the couch and into Poe's lap, the cane clattering to the floor. BB-8 whirred, excited and happy, and Poe wrapped his arms around Hux's waist. He was still too damn skinny, but he wasn't going to complain about it right now. He was just happy to have him in his arms again. 

He kissed back just as intently, feeling just as starved at Hux seemed for this contact. He yanked Hux closer by his hips, sliding his hands around to Hux's ass and squeezing. Hux tightened his arms around Poe's shoulders in response, biting at Poe's lip and grinding his hips against his thigh. Poe moaned into Hux's mouth, lifting his hips as much as he could as he tried to get his dick at the right angle for enough pressure to feel good rather than teasing and frustrating. 

But then Hux broke away and hissed in pain, shifting over to the side as he grabbed his leg and gritted his teeth. Poe immediately lifted Hux by his waist, a little concerned at how light he was, and setting him back up on the couch. He smoothed his hand over Hux's thigh again, trying to ease the hurt. 

"That can wait, huh?" Poe said, feeling a tad sheepish, even if Hux had been the one to start it. "Maybe for your bed back home? Pretty sure the only thing on this ship is a very small cot that barely holds one person, much less two." 

"Fair enough," Hux said, and he still sounded a little breathless. "Thank you." 

Poe was pretty sure he'd never heard Hux say thanks ever before. "For… the thing with Brooks?" Hux nodded. "Anytime. Seriously." He lifted himself up on his knees to kiss Hux once more. "Give me half a chance and I'll kill Pryde and your father, too."

"My father is _mine_ ," Hux whispered, "but we'll see about Pryde." He smirked, and Poe laughed just a little before backing away and clamoring to his feet. 

"I'm going to figure out what we have in the way of painkillers. Will you take some?" Hux nodded, so Poe left him sitting there and went to see what he could dig up.


End file.
